Heart and Soul

Ok. It's been a while since I posted.
There is something that I have noticed about my blog writing.
I write better when I am filled with anxiety. Or mad. Or sad. Or pissed off.
So I guess you could say that when I don't post here things are going well.
And they are with a few exceptions.

In the last two weeks we have had 2 separate late season snow storms.
Each storm dumped 8 inches of snow on our little corner of the world.
It wasn't awful, but my heart and soul are very weary of the whiteness outside.
Winter seems to have lasted a very long time this year.

We celebrated our 36th wedding anniversary by buying ourselves an RV.
It's a Toy Hauler, which means we can drive the Harley right up a built in ramp in the back, tie it down and secure it in the "living area", and then when we get to our destination, we will back the Harley down the ramp and then the Toy Hauler becomes our little home away from home.
It's got a queen bed, a shower and a little tiny tub and toilet, oven/stove, microwave, cupboards, couch, table, all the creature comforts of home.
We've had fun, him and I, buying all the necessary equipment and supplies we will need to take with us when we hit the road.
He retires in 3 years and we hope to travel around these here United States in our RV with our Harley and our little dog.
Now this man has aggravated me more often than not these past 36 years and let me tell you...
When he started talking about retirement I thought to myself 
"Girlfriend you are gonna kill him."
He likes to talks a lot in the morning. About nothing.
Especially to me, especially when I am reading my devotions and praying and having my Jesus time.
I am really glad when he leaves for work in the morning so I can settle back down and concentrate.
But retirement means him sitting next to me with his coffee, blathering on about whatever, every single solitary day.
It is distracting to me.
I love this man, heart and soul but I dislike his talking just for the sake of talking, just to fill in the silence. I find peace and pleasure in the silence.
Now I get the irony of this situation...I do. It's not very nice to be thinking mean things and wanting him to shut up when I've got Jesus on the line, ya know??
"Listen Pal! For the love of God, I'm talking to Jesus, STOP bothering me!!"
We are going to have to work something out in the close confines of this trailer.
But the thought of him and I being able to travel together is feeling pretty good right now.
And the thought of him retiring is not as repugnant to me as I once thought.
See?? Jesus does answer prayer. (Thank You Jesus for favors granted.)

The one other exception to my happiness lately would be the little 5 year old boy named A.J. Freund.
You may have seen it on the news. His drug addicted parents beat him to death, buried him in a shallow grave then waited 3 days to call the cops and report him as a missing child.
It is and has been heartbreaking to hear the 911 call, to see the mother "crying" on TV, to  be told of the condition of the house they lived in and the fact that they have had Child Protective Services involved with this family for the last 5 years and multiple police calls to the house for theft and battery and drugs.
This house is 2 blocks behind my own house.
These two adults who used to be his parents went on TV and begged him to come home, the mother even went on Good Morning America to beg his return, all the while KNOWING that he was already dead and buried, ALREADY KNOWING that she had beaten him to death 4 days prior.
My mind cannot comprehend this sort of behavior.
I went to high school with the dad. He was crowned Homecoming King.
He was the popular kid. He became a lawyer.
What in the actual hell happens to people that they can change so drastically?
Drugs, yes, but was there no time when, as they were punching him in his head as they held him down in an ice cold shower that neither of them thought to themselves....
"Wait. STOP! What are we DOING right now?!?
I am truly heartsick over this. Our whole town is heart broken.
We all searched for that boy.
I checked my backyard for him and yes, I even checked my garbage cans for him when the truth finally came out that they were now just looking for a body.
My hope is that Jesus was with that baby (and I know He was) and that perhaps Jesus stepped in and took that boys spirit moments before they landed the final blow.
I didn't know this boy but my heart and soul ache for him nonetheless.
And if I'm truthful, my heart aches for his parents too because I believe one day
they will realize just what it is they have done and no amount of crying or jail time or rehab is going to be able to fix it.
May Jesus have mercy on their souls.

Thanks for reading,
Love, Lolly

A Breath Prayer

To breathe

To simply be

To be aware of your presence

To make time to Be Still

To make time to worship and adore

For the gifts of your Love

For the gifts of your Grace

For your presence in our lives

For you, O Lord, I give you thanks

In your mercy, hear this humble prayer

Dona Nobis Pacem et in Terra

Grant Us Peace on Earth

~Pastor Michael Moore's blog

40 days and nights

With the exception of a few hours here and there, I have been off social media since I last posted.
I have been sick since my last post, February 21st.
I ain't never, in my whole life, ever been sick for 41 days in a row.
This virus was a muther@#$%*!
Pardon my french.

Want to know the details?
I'm sure you do.
Headache, double ear infection, coughing, shortness of breath, sore throat, body aches, exhaustion,
bronchitis, sinus infection, ringing ears, hearing loss, hoarse voice, dizziness and guilt.

I went grocery shopping one day, came home, put the groceries away and needed to take a nap for two hours. It literally wore me out.
I slept the day away almost every day. My head would start nodding around 10:00am.
I'd set an alarm clock so I would wake up in time to get the grandkids from school at 3:00pm.
They'd watch cartoons after school and I would doze on the couch.
I ate homemade chicken soup, drank green tea, took Elderberry syrup, drank vitamin C drinks,
put Thieves essential oil in my diffuser and on my feet, took long hot showers, napped when I could.

But it has been a very long end to winter this year and I sincerely hope that I am never ever
that sick again.

Gotta run. I am making another couple of batches of chicken soup since I depleted our entire supply
that we keep in the deep freezer.
Hope you are all doing well.
Happy Spring you guys!!

Thanks for reading,
Love, Lolly