The scent of wood smoke greeted me as I stepped out onto the front porch this morning.
It instantly reminded me of you and the tears started flowing.
Taking the dog for her walk around the block also makes me cry.
How many times did you and I walk this same route together?
Turning the corner towards home a Harley rumbles past me and the dog,
making me look up to see the driver with his passenger on the back,
her pony tail flapping in the wind and it makes me cry to think that you and I
will never ride our Harley together again.
Almost home and I hear the sirens first. When I look down the street I see
the emergency vehicles and their flashing lights heading to a call.
The driver of the emergency command vehicle waves at me, she knows I live close by.
I wonder where they are headed. It's strange to not have a radio in the house after 40 years.
If you were here I would know what is going on.
I dream of you almost every single night.
Sometimes we are boating, sometimes we are grocery shopping, sometimes you save me.
Other times you don't.
Nothing smells like you anymore.
I crave one of your bear hugs like oxygen. Feels like I can't breathe without you.
I wanna talk to you but I don't feel you here or near.
Once it felt like you laid down next to me in bed.
But mostly I feel alone. I am alone. And lonely.
The scent of wood smoke lingers...and reminds me of you.
Grief is not for the feint of heart I can tell you.
