Friday, April 17, 2015

1 plus 3 = I hate math

My husband came home for lunch today at noon.
He walked in the door and complimented me on how nice my hair looked.
He wondered if I liked my hair cut, and said that I appeared happy.

My hair cut appointment is today at 2:30..... (sigh, men.)

I had just finished changing our 2 year old granddaughters diaper.
It is her 3rd diarrhea diaper of the morning....(sigh, kids.)
As I was changing her, I saw our 5 year old grandson sprinting
for the bathroom...sick with diarrhea himself...he didn't make it
to the bathroom in time...(sigh) more shitty laundry.
(lest you forget, my husband stated that I looked happy.
I assure you...I wasn't)

Got a call this morning from our other daughter.
She needs a sitter for 4 days next week.
Her babysitter got called out of town on a family emergency.
She wants to know if I can babysit for our 1 year old grandson.

So in case you're doing the math folks...
That means that THIS granny will be watching all 3 grandkids next week.

3 grandkids all at the same time.



A one year old, a two year old and a 5 year old.

So let's DO that math, shall we?!?

There is 1 of me.
There are 3 of them.
I will be babysitting 1 girl and 2 boys for 4 days.
One will arrive at  7:00 am and stay til 6:00 pm
Two will arrive at 7:45 am and stay til 5:00 pm

2 of the grandkids still wear diapers.
1 of the grandkids has daily accidents in his undies.
They all feed themselves...give or take a few bites shoveled in by granny.
How many cans of Spaghettio's will I need? How many juice boxes?
They all constantly take off and lose their little socks.
They will all need more than 1 change of clothes during the day.
How many loads of laundry is that?

How many fights will I break up cuz  "He's not sharing?"
How many times will I say "It's her turn, now?"
How many times will I shout "Stop chasing those dogs?"
Where are your socks? Pick up your toys? Do you hear me?
Give it back?  Go Potty?  Spit that out!   No No NO!

And 1 final question-
Granny is going to the liquor store after she gets her hair cut.
She needs to buy more Pinot Grigio for next week.
By the time next Friday rolls around, approximately how many
glasses of wine will she have consumed each night after all 3 of
the grandkids have gone home?


  1. Oh, my! I think you will be too tired to drink anything!

    Thanks for you comment on my blog. It hurt my heart when I read that you were bullied. So often I hear about people who were picked last for sports and that struggled through school. That whole thing, it wraps itself into the fiber of your being, doesn't it? It has taken me at least 40 years to even being to let go of some of that pain.

    You are a beautiful person, Lolly. I feel honoured to know you and would pick you first to be my friend.

  2. Dear Me!!!! I can't even imagine that overwhelming feelings you must be having. My heart goes out to you for the coming week. Wishing you strength and patience my friend.