Writing the good

I read this today and in my head I thought   those could be my exact words!
If you've got nothing better to do today, I encourage you to read her post.

I would like to write like her.
I want to write about how I find God everywhere. And sometimes God finds me.
I've got lists of things that keep me up at night. I'm tired from chasing kids all day.
She says something about how hard it is to find friends at the age of 30.
Honey?  Try finding friends when you're 54.
Sometimes I am so lonely I ache.

And it's true what she says...the words do get in the way.

I think to myself Wow! this would be a great blog post, then promptly forget everything I wanted to write about in the next 5 minutes.

I tried a new recipe from The Pioneer Woman and it turned out fantastic.
Do ya'll really want to read about that??

I'd love to write a post about how pleasant the day was; how cute and adorable were these two kids!
But I yell a lot out of frustration or impatience and that makes us all a little cranky and sad.
They forgive me within minutes...I'm not so good with forgiving myself.

I wish I had a better way with words. Do I wish I was a writer? An Author?
Honestly, no I don't. I couldn't promote a book and go on tour and talk to strangers.
Talk to strangers?!? Are you kidding me?? No way.
But I can write to you guys and you are strangers although you don't feel that way to me.
I appreciate the comments. I appreciate the fact that you read these words of mine.
I am thankful and grateful that you all follow me here on this blog.
It does ease the ache of feeling so alone.

Maybe I'll start writing about the good that I see in my own life every day.
Let me think about that for a bit. I'll get back to you.
Love, Lolly

End of October update

Here's an update for those of you who are reading my blog.
My daughter is well on the road to recovery after having had her baby and feeling better and stronger everyday. A little sleep deprived but at least her iron stores are starting to build back up.
My new granddaughter is perfect and cute and sweet. A real quiet baby-just like her mama was.

Me and my 6 year old grandson have coughs. Today it is wet and blustery and raw outside.
I'd like to keep him home from school today mostly so I don't have to go out in this weather.

My 3 year old granddaughter was put on Miralax and it STILL took her 6 days to poop.
Now she must remain on Miralax for a month to retrain her colon. We will restart potty training after the month is up. At this point it is just such a huge relief that she is going poop again. It's watery due to the Miralax but it's better than her being stopped up. OK...enough of that story.

It's Fall here in Illinois but not too much color change is happening with our trees. We have a lot of green leaves in our area yet. The humidity is still hanging around too. I truly cannot wait for snow and cold.
Yes. I said it. Snow and cold weather.
I'm tired of feeling so warm and being aggravated with this humid weather.

What else?  Let me think a moment....
Yeah, no, I got nothin'.

If I think of anything else I'll fire up the ol' blog and type out another post.
Thanks for stopping by and thanks for reading my blog.
Love, Lolly

October

I find that I post more when there is bad news and/or when I need to vent.
So if I'm not writing here that must mean things are going well for me.
And right now I guess they are!
My daughter is recovering nicely.
My new granddaughter is thriving and gets cuter every day.
I spent all day Sunday and Sunday night with them. My son-in-law had to work his 24 hour shift.
Since it's still painful for my daughter to pick up her 2 year old boy it was my job to do all the lifting and hoisting of children. I loved every minute of my time there. Again I did laundry and made meals and told my daughter to nap. I played with my grandson, I sang, I read books, I said night time prayers with him. In the morning we had breakfast together and it was wonderful to see his sleepy little morning self with bed head. Truly I didn't want to leave.
But it was Monday morning and I knew my other two grandkids would be waiting for me
at 8:00am when I got home.
Also, I knew my house might be a little bit of a disaster when I got home after being gone for 24 hours. When I walked in the first thing I smelled was cat piss. What the??? Why do I smell cat piss??
A sink full of dishes, 3 loads of laundry and pissy floors...how does this happen in 24 hours??

Cooler weather is slowly coming our way. Thank You Jesus!
I've found the older I get the less I am able to tolerate any amount of humidity.
Him and I are making time for ourselves on most weekends by not being so available to babysit.
In the cool fall air it feels great to take a ride on our Harley to see the trees change color.
Our jobs keep us so busy and we've come to realize that we need our down time to recharge.
I used to feel guilty when I would say no to watching them or I wouldn't say no at all and then I'd be resentful. It's probably better to NOT be resentful when watching one's grandchildren.

Anyway...I'm feeling good, I'm feeling happy. I come alive in the colder weather.
I'm not so excited about sweater weather and boots. I'm more excited that I won't be sweating anymore. Well...maybe not AS sweaty anyway.

Sometimes I write a post and don't know how to close it up nicely.
Like this one.
My life is ordinary and regular and amazing and God is with me through it all.
HE answers my prayers and shows me HIS glory in everyday things like nature and sunsets and newborn grandkids.
I am always thankful and grateful to HIM for everything I do and have in this life.
I hope you too know the love of God and experience HIS grace and peace in your life.

Thanks for reading,
Love, Lolly

The new normal

I've been at my daughters house off and on for about 2 weeks now.
We started taking turns staying with her overnight even before the baby was born.
Her blood pressure would be so high at night that it scared us all.
We were all so worried about her having a possible stroke.
She was ordered to bed and that's hard to do when you have an active 2 year old in the house.
So between us and her mother in law we divided the babysitting duties.
When it was my (our) turn my husband would play with and entertain our two year old grandson,  whilst I cared for our grown daughter.
I did dishes, made meals, took out the garbage and recycles, washed, dried and folded laundry.
I changed his poopy diapers, picked up his toys strewn from one end of the house to the other and slept on the floor of his bedroom while he cried through the night for his momma.
Her mother in law (the big jerk) didn't lift a finger when it was her turn other than change his diapers, feed him and put him to bed.
I showed up for my shift on Friday night at 6:00pm after a full day with our other two grand kids.
I found a sink full of dirty dishes, full garbage cans and an explosion of toys everywhere.
All she said was "Bye" and the door slammed behind her.
Tsk...

Since our daughter had that emergency C-section she's been on light duty.
She lost a lot of blood.
The hospital wanted to do a blood transfusion but my daughter and her husband opted to try iron pills and a high iron diet to up her red blood cells. Idiots.
She feels the full brunt of her decision today I can tell you.
She has a had a headache almost constant for two weeks. Her skin color is waxy and pale. She's got a stomach ache from the iron, too many pain killers and then on top of that she is constipated too.
She has no appetite, is getting little sleep due to the presence of the new baby and is still attempting to breast feed. She feels guilty that she can't be active with her two year old son.
She cries. From the hormones, from being tired, from feeling ill, from the OB telling them that they can have no more babies.
After what she's been thru, I find it hard to believe that she would want anymore.
I keep telling her to try and see the wonder of it all, the miracle of it all.
She agrees with me that she should be grateful, and says she is trying to find the joy but she is still sad about the situation.

Her daughter is a dream baby. Undemanding..only crying when hungry or occasionally when her diaper is being changed. She was even quiet during her first bath.
She looks around with those beautiful blue newborn eyes all dreamy like. A perfect rosebud mouth.
Teeny tiny perfect little hands and feet. She is perfectly adorable.
I'm hoping that as the weeks progress and my daughter's strength returns to normal she'll be able to see all of the wonders of this perfect little human being.

We're back to taking turns babysitting on the next few weekends. Her husband has to go to work for a few days next week, so I'll be spending the night there this coming Saturday.
I'm looking forward to it.
To tell you the truth, it feels good to be needed. It feels good to do her dishes and laundry, to tell her to go take a nap, to make lunch and dinner for her, to help her out with the kids.
For now, this is our new normal. I'll take the inconvenience of it and be glad of it.
Because it means they both survived a scary delivery. It easily could have had a very different ending.

Thank You Jesus for listening to all of our prayers.
Thank You Jesus for favors granted.
I am feeling very blessed indeed.

Delaney Rey you're loved more than you will ever know!