Tuesday, November 8, 2016

I voted early

I'll add my two cents and do a blog post about election day and facing the future.
I admit that today has been filled with anxiety for me.
But it's not because of the candidates, although I do intensely dislike one of them and I will freak out if that candidate is elected!
I realize that lately I've been wrestling with anxiety. A lot.

It started when my daughter had a traumatic birth back in September.
Then my 3 year old granddaughter stopped pooping and didn't have a BM for 10 days. She was put on Miralax and it STILL took her 5 days to go potty.
Add to that the presidential debates and the biased media reports and the election attack ads on TV.
I got sick myself in the middle of all of that with a head cold and a sore throat.
Then my husband got a virus and was sick with body aches, and extreme fatigue for a week.
We found lumps in one dogs neck and near another dogs breastbone.
Trips to the vet cost us nearly $400.00 but the lumps turned out to be simple salivary glands and a harmless fatty tumor to keep an eye on.
Then our 14 year old Chihuahua got bit by a spider near his mouth and his face swelled. Back to the vet for steroids and benadryl.
Two days after that he developed a Pancreatitis attack with vomiting and bloody diarrhea.

Today feels like doomsday to me. My nerves feel shot.
My grandson has a cold and a cough that will. not. quit.
My granddaughter is still struggling with going potty...it's better but not normal yet.
I am so nervous about this poor old sick dog that I can hardly think straight.
I don't want him to suffer but I don't want him to die either.

I'm hot and sweaty and short tempered. I'm not hungry and I feel like I could sleep til December..
I called my sister so we could pray together. I told her that I've been praying since my daughter had her baby and  I have continued my prayers for sick dogs and grandkids and husband.
But honestly I haven't been praying as much as I have been bossing God around.

Don't let my dog die God. Don't let my daughter or granddaughter die God. Don't let my other grandkids be sick or unhealthy. Please make my grandson stop coughing God.

I'm feeling at a loss and out of control and it scares me. The news scares me.
I want life to go my way and when it doesn't I get all panicky.
My sister and I decided that what we need to do is another Bible study.
Something that keeps us in the word.
Something that reminds us about the love of God.
Something that will have us trusting Him again, singing praises to Him instead of only offering up our worries and prayer requests.

I read this today. It was exactly what I needed to calm my nerves about this stupid election.
It also gave me a bit of a boost in the grace department.
To give my grand kids grace with their illnesses  and potty problems.
To give my husband grace when he is ill or tired or fatigued from his own job and life.
To give myself grace for being a worry wart and for being short tempered and testy.

For remembering to post my gratitude for this week-

I voted last week so I wouldn't have to go to the polls today with the grand kids in tow.
The dog is a little better after giving him his meds (but I'm still worried)
My grandson has coughed a million times since I sat down to type this.
My granddaughter stood behind me and brushed my hair the whole time I  typed this.
This morning we made 3 dozen cookies together.
I harvested my Thyme, Lemon Thyme and Lemon Verbena and dried it for winter storage.
Next week I'll harvest the Lavender.
I made a batch of cucumbers and dill for my husbands lunch.
Today it is sunny and 60 degrees. (They predicted rain)
Outside my window the trees are glowing gold and orange.
I have a sister that prays with me and for me when I call her filled with anxiety.

I'm praying that this election goes smoothly. My nerves could use a break.

Thanks for reading,
Love Lolly


  1. Our God is a great big God Lolly girl. I'm praying for you too. A little peace to get you through the day and a lot more to get you through the week, month and through the holidays. Well done with you gratitude when the anxiety works so hard at telling you different. Well done indeed!

  2. I have never been so worried about an election that has nothing to do with me.

  3. Oh Lolly, I just love you. I think of our time sitting and drinking coffee or Diet Coke or whatever we had...a year ago already, and I am so grateful that I have your kind sweet face to put to your words. I late getting here.....but I read about your dog on FB. I am so sorry. Some times life feels like it all weighs too much to carry. Add in a crazy political climate and yes....it's a lot to navigate! I love your gratitude at the bottom of your post. Good job rallying yourself back around. <3